What it Takes to Jump Off a Bridge

The same cool drizzle that chilled us all day seemed to disappear as we stood atop the bridge. Falling some hundred feet below us was a ferocious white water cascade, foaming violently. We said goodbye to the bus and the UK couple and felt the eyes of the entire group asking the same question,

“Are they seriously going to do this?!”

We were joined by two big bros from California who were up for anything. And so there we all stood, looking at the thin red line attached to the bridge and the seemingly infinite abyss that lay below.
The operator of this establishment (if you could call a rope on a bridge and a kid who wasn’t much older than me running it an establishment) came forward with the harness. I could feel the tense hesitation as we all questioned our will once again. Everyone looked around and I knew. This was my time. I felt a sudden and empowering fortitude rise in me. I felt the call of leadership beckon me to set an example and not to succumb to any fear that tempted an excuse. I stepped into the harness as it was fastened to my body. I turned, battle ready toward the group and strode up the embankment then down along the bridge eyes fixed ahead, the cool kiss of the rain now on my face.

My whole life I have been afraid of being out of control. I have avoided experiences like roller coasters and long waterslides or any physical event where I could not control my speed. I know this sounds ridiculous coming from a guy who has ridden his bicycle well over fifty miles and hour and preached an adventurous lifestyle. But more often than not I have shown cowardice, inaction, and struggle with going home regretful rather than going big. I am not just speaking of physical tests but the challenge of faith, life, and becoming a man in a society that has a heck of a time defining what godly masculinity looks like let alone calling young men like me too it.

At the center of the bridge I was met by another fellow who showed me pictures of what I was suppose to do as he couldn’t effectively explain them to me in English. I smiled and laughed to myself how ridiculous what I was doing really was. “Nick you are jumping off a bridge, you know that right. This could be it.”
The lifeline that my trust would have to find rest in was fastened firmly to my chest. I cool breath filled my lungs calming my heart, my limbs relaxed and I took the first step onto the railing.

Being in control is wonderful isn’t it, to know and not worry. To have it all together or at least project that confidence. After becoming a Christian in high school I had many who challenged me to lead others, to step up and present Christianity to the world. I lived it too feeding on the sense of pride others took in me. My heart was mostly in the right place but the desire to please others was (and sometimes still is) my drive. Judgment of others, and myself became the fruit of that drive; so that when sin ate away at my foundation it became difficult to feel the peace and freedom of grace.

Resting my hand on the shoulder of my guide I stood up on the concrete rail. The thunderous ravine below leading to the silvery river and the lush green mountains surrounding spread out before me. Ecuador is beautiful. I took a breath of it. The line pulled on my body reminding of my circumstance. I looked down over the rocks and foam feeling the twinge of death and the nervous ache in the stomach. My toes dangled over the edge of the rail. I lifted a thumb and a smile to others. A calm again swept over me. Stillness.

I felt my legs bend then release. My body flew spread out catching the thin air. A wushed hush rushed into my ears. The smell of life’s richness filled my nose. My eyes stared ahead as the ground sped closer. I fell as fast as the sweet rain. Overwhelmed I offered a prayer in those simple seconds of flight thankful for all I have been blessed with in this life. My eyes closed unable to bare the wondrousness of it all. Peace
My body splayed flipped up side down as the line reached its length swinging me in a smooth arch just over the cascades beneath the bridge. As I reached the zenith of the swing I felt a cry as carnal as Adams first words reach my lips and I bellowed it out over the falls.

After the adrenaline rush subsided the profound peace I had experienced spoke to me. When I look at my life as a Christian the most alive I have felt has almost always coincided with risking something. Putting my pride, my goals, and my life in the capable hands of God trusting that He will catch me when I jump. My life was made for this sort of faith. Faith that God is going to use me if I’m willing to jump. I love the story in Matthew 16 when Peter calls out to Jesus walking on the water. “Lord, if it is you . . . tell me to come to you on the water. Come, he said. Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus” I experienced that way when I stood up in Church on an almost unheard of alter-call Sunday in our church (a visiting pastor made it happen) and I jumped into a life long relationship with Christ. I feel that tug on my chest every time I am confronted with the brokenness in this world, which can be overcome through loving action taught by Jesus. I know that peace when I confess my struggle with sin in the company of both God and fellow strugglers.

One by one we all made the leap, some gracefully, some not so much, but all without regret.

So what does it take to jump? Trust that what holds you is strong. Hope that there is much much more in store for your life. Faith that this life is not the end. Oh and being a little foolish doesn’t hurt.

Can you hear Him? “Come” He dares.

Planet Earth

So, I am not an animal lover in any sense of the word.  I don't have pets and don't really enjoy being around animals.  However, when the opportunity arises to be able to see animals in their natural habitat I always jump at the chance.  On Wednesday, our little group was able to ride out in the Pacific Ocean to see humpback whales.  Our own mini-version of the Planet Earth series.  In my mind I was envisioning a quiet, calm ride out to sea followed by the opportunity to see the whales from a distance.  I was quite wrong on most accounts.

After paying $15 per person, that included whale sighting insurance, we all hopped in a small boat.  The boat was really like a large row boat with a motor attached.  Two guides were also on the boat with us, one to steer the motor from the back and the other to stand up front and signal direction.  We headed out in the ocean at a speedy pace.  And, the farther out we went the larger the waves became.  Soon, John was dripping wet from the waves crashing on the side of the boat where he was sitting.  I found myself clutching the side of the boat until my knuckles were white and holding my small bag I had brought along so as not to lose the bag or myself overboard.  We were enjoying the ride but quickly caught on to the signals from the guy up front.  When he made a hand signal and bent his knees we knew we were in for a large wave.  It was more than the quiet, calm ride I had imagined.  After traveling for about 15-20 minutes Lisa and Nick saw the guy up front duck completely down and grab on the side for dear life... that was a new signal! We hit two back to back waves very hard and we all flew off our seats. Lisa and Nick collided heads, Alan and I launched in the air, and poor John was drenched by gallons of salt water.  Even the two guides seemed a bit shook up from those hits and we slowed down a bit after that.

As I looked back to shore, I could no longer see land.  All around us was the Pacific Ocean as far as I could see.  I was expecting to be sitting awhile before seeing any whales.  However, almost immediately a spout of water shoot up in the air and we saw our first glimpse of a humpback whale.  For the next 45 minutes or so we were literally surrounded by whales.  And, the anticipation of not knowing where one, two, or three might surface was exhilarating.  To see such a huge animal so close was truly awesome.  One of my favorite moments was when two humpback whales were surfacing to our right and we were able to travel right next to them as they came up and down a few times in a row.  It was also an incredible sight to see the tail come out of the ocean before the whole whale disappeared again in the sea.  

We watched all around us, heads in constant motion, for the next whale sighting or spout of water.   It never became boring to see a whale and we were all in awe of the grace and beauty of the whales.  That awe was combined with a bit of fear not knowing how safe we were on our small vessel.  Would a whale come up right under us?  Were we going to hit another hard wave and end up swimming with the whales?  What other creatures were lurking in the waters that might not be as friendly as the whales?  It was quite an experience.

After our time was up and we began heading back to land, I could not help but be overwhelmed by how small and powerless people really are.  I think as people we have the ability to control and manipulate so much around us in our day to day lives.  But, when it comes down to it, this world is so much greater than anything we can do.  The land and sea and all the creatures that live on it with us easily are more powerful that one individual person.  I feel we have an important task set for us to take care of the planet and be sure to honor the world we are living in.  As I reflected that night in my journal, I feel that being out in the Pacific Ocean to experience one animal that is so massive and wonderful truly shows us God's creativity and wonder.  There is such diversity and care that was taken in creating Earth.  We are entrusted to care for the world and all that is a part of it.  I hope that I am able to take all these experiences and bring them home with me to change the ways I live so that I am respecting the planet all that much more.

Kristina          

Baños Righteous! Righteous!!

       The cool air of a night of rain met our waking eyes, chilling us to the bone. We ate breakfast by candlelight as the power in town was out for the day. The warmth of huevos rancheros and a deep rich brew coated my insides with the will to step out into the drizzle. Adventure sang in the air. Before long we boarded a brightly colored bus with rafts strapped on top and a pleasant conversation started with a bright young couple from the UK. They decided to leave work and travel the South American continent from March till November (if their money held out). There were some twenty others mostly North America. All of us huddled on the wood bench seats of the bus staring out into the clouded mountains and valley we descended into. Occasionally a distant waterfall sliced through the heavy greenery falling down into the river hundreds feet below foaming, tumultuous, and swollen from the nights previous rain.
I was in my element, thoroughly giddy. But in a manly way of course.

We made a turn down a step dirt road and came to a sudden halt. After unloading ourselves, the rafts, and dawning welcome wetsuits with distinct odors we readied our selves for the ride. Our guides gave a somewhat encouraging and very funny safety presentation on how to die; I mean not die in or out of the raft. With helmets on and a lesson on how to paddle as a team we carried the raft on our head down to the river. The discomfort this cause my neck and arms was slightly alarming but not quite as alarming as the rickety suspension cable bridge we crossed over to put our vessel in the water. And by water I mean thunderous white water! Yeah!! Righteous!!! Righteous!!!!
Only slightly nervous, we piled in and stroked strongly with stoic faces and moved into the current.
Our guide spoke about as much English as I do Spanish so every time he spoke we all looked at John for a translation the way a dog does with head cocked to one side. But after our first big rapid we figured each other out. The Brit couple, our quartet, and guide were forged into the best raft on the river in know time. We even played a key role in the rescue of another raft that capsized five min into trip. It is pretty exciting pulling bodies (alive bodies) from the rapids.
Amazing I know!

But all pride aside there is nothing quite like paddling furiously up to the base of a swell and hitting it head on, taking the crisp water in mouth with a silly grin dripping from your face. We powered through numerous class 3+ and 4 rapids with toes dug in and backs occasionally pulling in unison. Oh the joy of testing yourself against something larger than you are! It is a humbling experience to come face to face with God’s creation, and feel its wildness, untamed since its forming, We saw a rockslide of tons of earth cascaded into the river. As we rafted boulders on the river bottom literally thundered below us, rolling stones on their way to the Amazon. It all leaves you breathlessly in awe, feeling rather small. Which is really good on occasion remember you are small.
In no time our trip was finished and we were on the way to a prepared lunch and the next adventure: a rope, a bridge, and a long, long, long way down.

To be continued . . . dun dun dun!

This is the Day

Our time in Banos was quite adventurous and touristy.  I am hoping that Nick will soon be writing about our white water rafting trip down Rio Verde and our puenting experience. However, for me, last Tuesday jumping off the bridge didn't turn out quite as amazing as it was for the other three.  Although I had found out about the bridge jumping in my Lonely Planet book and suggested it to the group my body and mind did not agree when it came time to actually take the plunge.  I had already watched both Nick and Lisa jump and was excited for my turn.  However, once I was strapped in the harness and given minimal directions in Spanish I started to lose my nerve.  Standing up on the bridge ledge while looking down at class six rapids my knees turned to Jell-O, which is the not the best way to jump like Super Man. Fortunately, the guy that had latched me in was still holding my arm and was able to catch my full body weight and throw me off the bridge so I didn't hit the edge when my knees buckled and I collapsed.  I did enjoy the swinging portion of the jump but by the end of the evening I had a painful and growing bruise on my upper right arm where the guy had caught me.  And, the next morning I found more bruises in various places including my ribs where the harness had caught me wrong when I was pushed.  

So, as it turned out for the next few days I was in some pain and it hurt to laugh because of my bruises around the ribs.  As you can imagine, sitting in the car driving down to Shell was not the best place for me to be.  My general attitude toward serving declined tremendously.  We did finally arrive at the home of a missionary, Pattie Sue, with whom Alan is friends.  She runs an orphanage and currently has 45 children living with her.  Our group was asked to come and hang tarp around the roof top of her building so that all the supplies and donations were not exposed to the street.  She was also hoping we could install a hot water heater for the showers.  We stopped in on Wednesday to take a look around, see what supplies we were going to need, and come up with a general plan.  I decided to take a few minutes to go in the section  of the home that houses about 20 toddlers.  What I didn't know before our arrival was that almost 100% of the children at Pattie Sue's home have either a physical or mental disability.  The disabilities range from hand and feet deformations to Autism.  Just being in the room for less than an hour was tiring and draining.  Immediately I was glad that we were there to help with building upstairs instead of spending time with the children.  Another group from Iowa was there volunteering for a full week and many of the women from that group had been spending their time with the children.

After dinner that night, Faby decided that she wanted to teach a lesson to the children the following day.  Faby and I both noticed that the children lacked oral communication skills, some not knowing their name, and few communicating with sounds at all.  Faby wanted all the children to have a lesson responding to and saying their names, practicing animal sounds, and learning basic body parts.  Faby had brought construction paper, glue, scissors, and popsicle sticks from the orphanage and put us all to work making happy faces for all 45 children, as well as animal and body part drawings.  John and I worked on making happy face cut-outs to glue on the popsicle sticks while Nick and Lisa tackled the artistic side of drawing over ten animals and numerous body parts so Faby could use them to teach with.  We were all exhausted from the previous day of adventure in Banos and I continued to be sore.  It was a challenge for all of us to put our heart into making these crafts.  But an even greater challenge came when Faby requested that Lisa and I spend the day with her in the orphanage while the boys helped Alan. Dread came over me.  I didn't think I had it in me to spend hours with so many toddlers.  For those of you who know me, even though I am a teacher, little children are not my "thing."  Plus, I felt hesitant to step in where the other group had been establishing relationships and working.  I didn't want them to feel like we were taking over or leaving them out. 

The next morning following devotionals I shared how I was feeling with Nick, Lisa, and John.  I told them I didn't think I could do it and that I was not looking forward to the day at all.  I was sore, tired, and didn't want to be with the children.  When we arrived at Pattie Sue's we all headed up to the roof top to begin preparations for hanging the tarp.  Almost immediately I was summons by Faby to join  her in the house.  I said good-bye to the group and headed inside to start blowing up balloons.  Lisa came down to the house almost immediately and I was so thankful.  And, I continue to know without Lisa deciding to join me with the children I don't think I could have done it.  While the two of us blew up balloons, Faby began the lesson trying to have the children respond and repeat their names.  Faby also moved through the animal sounds and body parts while Lisa and I sat with the many kids and joined in the lesson.  At the very end, Faby had us hand out balloons to the children when they were able to respond or say their name.  My heart skipped a beat when I realized I was soon going to be in a room with about 20 children, babies to age 4, all brandishing balloons.  But, you know what, it was amazing.  The kids were having a wonderful time playing. Lisa and I quickly were holding kids, playing with them, and saving the balloons from being popped by Reuben.  The morning flew by as we were learning the kids names, becoming attached to the littlest ones that I had originally not wanted to spend the day with.  It was soon lunch time and the house mothers were ready to take back over.  It was almost hard to leave the kids as they clung to our fingers or didn't want us to put them down.  

Lisa and Judy

Happy with balloons!

Rescuing the pink balloon from Reuben (in the red shirt), the balloon popper

Following lunch, Lisa and I did join back up with John and Nick to hang the tarp.  We worked until 7:00 pm that night as a team to hang the tarp into cement columns using just some left over wood planks, wire, a staple gun, and a drill that caused us multiple trips to the hardware store for replacement bits.  

As I reflect back over the day at Pattie Sue's I can say for certain that it was a day that belonged to God.  He provided me strength to be with the kids.  He sent Lisa back downstairs to be with me.  He also provided a random stranger in the afternoon who had plumbing skills to finish off the water heater job.  He set in motion for all of us to be tackling the work that best fit our gifts and skills while we helped out Pattie Sue.  It was a day of service and love.  Pattie Sue has a great heart and a wonderful mission to serve the children who need love the most.  Even for just a few days, I am glad to have been a very small part of her home and loving presence to the children.  

Kristina

(feeling much better, but still has a nasty bruise on her arm)

 

Great Expectations

Through my time at GPC and college I participated in a lot of short-term mission projects. As I think I’ve mentioned before, one of these trips was to Ecuador. I fell in love with the country and knew I needed to go back. Therefore, coming into this trip I had high hopes for what I would experience and feel. I looked forward to the warm, family-oriented culture, the focus on practical, daily things, and escape from the highly skeptical, intellectual world that I live in at home.
I also looked forward to practicing a more disciplined lifestyle. In the month before coming to Ecuador I was a nomad; staying at different friends houses in Baltimore during the week, working full time at my internship, traveling home and to Boston on weekends, and trying to sort out my plans for the next stages of my life. I was going full tilt, racing through each day with piles of to-do lists and spending each night saying goodbye to friends. Needless to say, I didn’t make a lot of time for quiet time with God, or quiet time in general. I kept on running the rat race thinking that soon I’d be in Ecuador, where my only task would be to love others and be open to new things and I could rest. It would be the perfect reset button to my hectic life, before beginning my new life in Boston.

The first thing that happened to me here in this lovely country was nightmares—Nightmares that woke me in the middle of the night with every muscle in my body tense and my heart rate elevated. Staring into the pitch dark, it would take several long minutes to realize they weren’t real. I had them for five nights. Each one hit close to home, bringing up some insecurity or unresolved problem that I had successfully (I thought) hidden away. Apparently I had way more on my mind that I knew, and I hadn’t had the time to actually sit, be still and deal with that until I got here. And when I did they just flooded out, all at once.
The next thing I experienced in Ecuador was boredom. I know that sounds horrible- we’re here to serve and do God’s work in a new and exciting culture… but we spend a lot of time just around the house. I was really disappointed with all the down time and found myself getting frustrated and short-tempered. To compound this, we were asked to help out with cleaning and chores. Normally this wouldn’t be a problem, but I was so focused on wanting to do something big and exciting for God that spending time vacuuming just didn’t seem as important.

Hence came God’s big message, while I was killing time swinging in a hammock one afternoon. It came booming through the mundane things that were driving me crazy: SLOW DOWN.
How can I lead a disciplined life, let alone perform huge acts of love and service, when my spirit is twisted up in knots? I was keeping myself busy to avoid dealing with the things that were heavy upon my heart. And how can I faithfully serve in big ways, when I don’t have the patience to serve in small ways? It took the first week of my time in Ecuador to realize that, and the second week to actually accept that.
I’m not saying that I now joyfully take to the dusting or that I don’t get antsy to get out and be active, but I realize the importance of taking time to slow down and spend quiet time with God. My prayer as this trip continues is that I will grow in patience and come to enjoy the stillness that permeates our Ecuadorian way of life.

Oh, and I’m happy to report that once that message got pounded into my head big ways to show God’s love and exciting things did happen, but I’ll let the others tell you about those :o)

Thanks for letting me share,
Lisa

Fine Dining in El Tingo

This morning Alan and Faby decided they wanted to go on a little walk up to the chapel on the mountain behind the house. So we all put on our walking clothes and headed up the rock path towards the chapel. Once up there we were met with a beautiful view. After we had enjoyed the scenery for a few minutes, Alan suggested we take a different path back down the mountain. And on our way back down another rock/dirt road we stumbled upon what we later found out was rated the third best restaurant in all of Ecuador! Faby was an old family friend of the owner, Thomas, so we got a tour of the place. 

We started in the front where the customers dine. There were two huge arrangements of roses (one inside and one outside) and roses on every table. The salt and pepper were in sea shells on the tables. There were old refrigerators full of bottles of wine. It was a beautiful place to eat. There was even part of a whale skeleton that Thomas had found on a beach, hid in the mountains, and then went back a few years later to pick up. Then Thomas took us out back and showed us the cages where they keep all the quail, pheasants, chickens, and rabbits that they serve. Then on the way to their herb garden we passed the little pond that the trout swim in before they are served as fresh as physically possible. The herb garden was quite large and had every seasoning the restaurant could possibly need. Once we were done smelling all the little samples of herbs Thomas handed to us, he told us we could take a table outside. So we all sat down expecting a little sample of what was on the menu that day. We were in for a surprise.

First came the bread. Three different types; white, wheat, and cornbread, all homemade with homemade butter, herb butter and liver pâté. I wasn't quite adventurous enough to try the liver spread so I stuck to the herb butter. It was the perfect complement to the subtle tastes of the fresh bread.

Then our waiter, Carlos, brought out a beautiful salad and served us all. The lettuce, radishes, and cucumber were crisp and crunchy, fresh from the garden, and the dressing was sweet but mild enough to really bring out all the flavors of the vegetables without overpowering them. To drink there was mandarin orange juice, the freshest, most natural tasting juice I have ever had. And naturally amazing.

Next was the main course: A sizzling steak with potatoes au gratin and macaroni and cheese with a sweet salsa and a yogurt sauce. The steak was on a hot rock, so it didn't stop sizzling for a while. It was cooked a perfect medium-well and expertly seasoned. Both the salsa and the yogurt sauce were great, but the taste of the steak alone was exciting enough to make you wish for more. The potatoes had little bits of bacon in them and had a rich bacon taste to them that prompted Kristina's question, "why were there only three?" By the end of the meal we were all so satisfied we couldn't possibly have asked for anything more. We understood why people drive down from Quito (a 40 minute drive) all the time just to eat lunch.

Best walk ever.

-John

Patience

This week we had the very great honor of leading the vacation bible school at the Montebello Academy, a top tier, Christian private school in Ecuador.  When we were asked to help out we had no idea what we were getting ourselves into.  Nick, John, and I had led a VBS in Ecuador last time we were here, which mostly consisted of entertaining the children and keeping them from hurting each other for a few hours a day.  But this... this was a fully staffed school with a clear curriculum, ridiculous space and resources, and lots of very intelligent (and of course, mischievous) kids.  Thank goodness Kristina is a veteran school teacher and knew just how to tackle all our planning, teaching, and scheduling problems; we would have been completely lost without her.  Still,  I'm not quite sure how we made it out alive.

The lessons for VBS were on  the fruit of the Spirit.  We covered a different fruit each day: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, and Kindness.  These gifts were certainly used and tested  as we went through our rotation of classes.  I'll have to get the others to post some of their own stories of the kids' antics later on.  My personal favorite moment from my music classes was when a couple of the boys in the 1st grade class got very carried away singing the music and had to jump up on their chairs, swinging their arms out wide, eyes closed, and belting "I've got the joy, joy, joy" in their best little opera voices.  Adorable, yes, but not conducive for getting the class to focus.  

 

Presenting a song before the whole group

We also had fun with the language barrier.  The academy teaches only in English, so we had been told not to worry, all the students should be able to understand us just fine.  But this was a program for new students, so their skills were not up to par yet.  I know I got a lot of blank stares as I tried to teach them about singing in rounds, using rhythm instruments in a non-chaotic fashion, and asking people to please stop kicking the person next to them.  Fortunately arm waving, exaggerated facial expressions, and a little bit of Spanglish really did the trick.  However hackneyed the expression may be, the smile truly is an international language.

Lisa leading kids in song

Everyday this week all four of us came home completely exhausted.  And for me, that meant being a fair bit crankier the rest of the day, unless I got a nap.  Almost every bit of Ecuadorean life that was different from what I was used to or had expected (which was quite a lot) seemed to rub me the wrong way.  From our crazy meals, to the barking dogs (aka, Legions of Satan), to the slower internet, to the people at the store across the street not understanding for the third time that yes, we would return our glass bottles, I felt myself getting more and more frustrated.

Thank goodness we studied patience this week.  With the gift of patience I'm learning to take a step back and enjoy this new culture.  This has also helped me appreciate what it means to be a missionary and a Christian.  God works in His own time, and all we can do is be patient and willing to be part of His plan.   I have a whole other post I'm working on in my head about God and His timing, so check back soon!

I am thankful that the week of VBS is over, but I am even more thankful for the lessons learned thus far.  And I thank you all for reading our blog and supporting us during this crazy little journey!  It really means a lot to this occasionally cranky girl, hehe.

Much love,

Lisa